#13 Just A Thought Experiment

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Dear Internet, dear Nana,

I try to put myself in Ben’s shoes. I think that while a lot of his suffering might be epigenetic, a great deal also comes from growing up in a system that asks the male-born to walk around like unfeeling rocks or automatons. Men are dehumanizing themselves and objectifying women. If the man is a machine and the woman is a possession, who then is left to be human? Those who demand emotions and ethics are making a brave stand in a society where the only emotion is angst disguised as anger and ethics is just a warped argument in a discussion rooted in greed.

As I look forward to the times when these things have “devolutionized” themselves out of existence, it is still an educational experience in the abstract. Concretely, I have to be careful and not let empathy turn into co-suffering. I have to be as brave as those marginalized by discrimination, especially seeing that I am just a bystander and not a target. Those who don’t conform, by choice or by happenstance, are facing indignities daily.

When one speaks up against the abusers of the power imbalance or the neglect of a minority, one gets weird looks, of course. I don’t care, it’s the least I can do to advance humanity, even if it’s on a small scale, like telling a man in the subway to stop harassing the woman he’s got cornered.

Assuming that there is truth to the butterfly effect, small acts can be of great consequence in the long run. Let’s make these small acts progressive! Be part of the future, be part of the change. Humanity will persevere through you, dear Internet.

If the man is a machine and the woman is a possession, who then is left to be human?

Getting back to Ben’s notes; as I told you last time, a lot of what he has written is in code. I can’t solve this by myself, not without having the interfaces to access information the way I am used to. I hope I am not screaming into the void here; If you can find the time and are kind enough to help me out, I would greatly appreciate it. Here is what I got:

P’cl zahyalk av dpaokyhd myvt hss vm aol hyapzaz. P qbza jhu’a mpuk huf qvf pu jylhapun ypnoa uvd, huk pa dvbsku’a il mhpy av kyhn aolt kvdu dpao tl. Pu mhja, pa dvbsk il bwzlaapun hss hyvbuk. Zv mvy uvd, P rllw av tfzlsm, huk kyhd huk dypal pm P mlls sprl pa. Tvzasf P kv uvaopun. Dl dpss zll pm aoha johunlz huf aptl zvvu, iba pm uva, P nblzz P ht vrhf dpao aoha, avv.

P‘cl illu aopurpun hivba aptl huk zwhjl h sva yljluasf. Wofzpjz ohz hsdhfz ohk aopz jhstpun xbhspaf mvy tl, dolu tf tpuk jhu’a nla xbpla hivba aol zthss zabmm, uvaopun zvvaolz tl tvyl aohu svvrpun bw huk mpukpun wlhjl htvun aol zahyz. Aopurpun hivba aol lukslzzulzz  vm aptl pz zbjo h nylha lxbhspgly. P ht obya, P ht pu klzwhpy, iba pa dvu’a hsdhfz il aopz dhf. Aptl pz uva h jvuzahua, iba h ibujo vm puzahujlz. Pa’z aol zhtl dpao zwhjl. P tpzz aol wlvwsl P’cl svza, P ulcly mlls sprl P ilsvun. Iba pu aol nyhuk zjoltl uv vul ylhssf ilsvunz. Dl hyl sbjrf huvthsplz. Pm dl dlyl hss hdhyl vm aopz, aol dvysk tpnoa svvr h sva kpmmlylua. Aol Hivypnpulz dlyl vu av zvtlaopun dpao aolpy kylht dhsrz.

Aolzl aovbnoaz hyl if uv tlhuz wyvmvbuk;  P‘t zbyl thuf vaolyz tbza mpuk zvshjl pu aolt hz dlss. P dpzo P jvbsk mpuk vba doha aolf tpnoa slhk av. Thfil wofzpjz pazlsm jhu olsw? P qbza ylhk Uvcprvc’z wypujpwsl hnhpu: Pm hu lclua lepzaz aoha jhbzlz h whyhkve vy “johunl” av aol whza, aol wyvihipspaf vm aoha lclua pz glyv. Pa dvbsk aobz il ptwvzzpisl av jylhal aptl whyhkvelz. Jvuzpklypun doha Thaa Cpzzly dyval vu U-ubtily dvytovslz, dl tpnoa kpzylnhyk wvzzpisl whyhkvelz kbypun h ayhcls iljhbzl aolf dvbsk il whya vm aol jbycl yhaoly aohu aol luayhujl huk lepa wvpua.

Aolf dpss vusf ylthpu wopsvzvwopjhs ofwvaolapjhsz hz svun hz P kvu’a zvscl aol wyhjapjhs wyvisltz aoha hypzl dolu jvumyvuapun aol ihzpjz:

Aol ipnnlza wyvislt dpao aptl ayhcls pz ihzpjhssf aol zhtl hz dpao alslwvyahapvu – pa ylxbpylz h thzz pualyjohunl. Tlhupun *tf* thaaly, aol thaaly aoha pz tl, ullkz av il ayhuzwvyalk aoyvbno zwhjl/aptl (zwhjl-aptl). Pa’z pumvythapvu pu huf jhzl, pa’z jvkl – pm aolyl lclu pz zbjo h aopun. Pm tf pumvythapvu, pu h whjrlk, jvtwylzzlk zahal, pz zlua zvtldolyl lszl dpaovba paz’ jvyylzwvukpun thaaly, pa dvbsk ullk lxbhs thaaly pu vykly av “ptwypua”. Dopjo slhkz av aol xblzapvu vm doha zahal vy zohwl zbjo thaaly dvbsk ohcl av il  pu. P dvbsk nblzz aoha aol jsvzly pa ylzltislz tf vdu thaaly, aol slzz vm tf pumvythapvu ullkz av il jvtwylzzlk huk zlua.
Zv, hu pualyjohunl dvbsk il hu hkchuahnl mvy h zbjjlzzmbs ayhuzwvya. Ohcl adv nlulapjhssf pkluapjhs pukpcpkbhsz zdpajo wshjlz. Aopz dvbsk ylkbjl aol johujl vm khah jvyybwapvu vy tpzzpun whjrlaz. Aol hkchuahnl dvbsk il aoha vul jvbsk zdpajo wshjlz dpao h whza vy mbabyl zlsm!

Waiting for the void to respond,

4 thoughts on “#13 Just A Thought Experiment

  1. The Code Says this:
    i’ve started to withdraw from all of the artists. i just can’t find any joy in creating right now, and it wouldn’t be fair to drag them down with me. in fact, it would be upsetting all around. so for now, i keep to myself, and draw and write if i feel like it. mostly i do nothing. we will see if that changes any time soon, but if not, i guess i am okay with that, too.

    i‘ve been thinking about time and space a lot recently. physics has always had this calming quality for me, when my mind can’t get quiet about the small stuff, nothing soothes me more than looking up and finding peace among the stars. thinking about the endlessness of time is such a great equalizer. i am hurt, i am in despair, but it won’t always be this way. time is not a constant, but a bunch of instances. it’s the same with space. i miss the people i’ve lost, i never feel like i belong. but in the grand scheme no one really belongs. we are lucky anomalies. if we were all aware of this, the world might look a lot different. the aborigines were on to something with their dream walks.

    these thoughts are by no means profound; i‘m sure many others must find solace in them as well. i wish i could find out what they might lead to. maybe physics itself can help? i just read novikov’s principle again: if an event exists that causes a paradox or “change” to the past, the probability of that event is zero. it would thus be impossible to create time paradoxes. considering what matt visser wrote on n-number wormholes, we might disregard possible paradoxes during a travel because they would be part of the curve rather than the entrance and exit point.

    they will only remain philosophical hypotheticals as long as i don’t solve the practical problems that arise when confronting the basics:

    the biggest problem with time travel is basically the same as with teleportation – it requires a mass interchange. meaning *my* matter, the matter that is me, needs to be transported through space/time (space-time). it’s information in any case, it’s code – if there even is such a thing. if my information, in a packed, compressed state, is sent somewhere else without its’ corresponding matter, it would need equal matter in order to “imprint”. which leads to the question of what state or shape such matter would have to be in. i would guess that the closer it resembles my own matter, the less of my information needs to be compressed and sent.
    so, an interchange would be an advantage for a successful transport. have two genetically identical individuals switch places. this would reduce the chance of data corruption or missing packets. the advantage would be that one could switch places with a past or future self!

    1. Dear TrulyNathan, that was quick! Thank you so much! It’s weird to read Ben’s thoughts. I know we are connected, but having never met him, I am still an intruder to notes he tried to hide with code. The duality of his mindset baffles me. The back and forth between a poetic, if troubled view on the world that switches to a keen scientific approach in a sentence.
      At least I start to understand, why I am here. Am I though? If I understand correctly, my matter is still in 2107, while I walk around in Ben’s molecules. When I “landed” in your time, I was so freaked out at first, I could barely speak. This feels like a flash back.
      I have to think about what to do next. I’ll get back to you on that.

  2. Rielle,

    it looks like Ben used Caesar Cipher 7. How cool you found a possible explanation for your journey!

    Your visual research and your emotional topics still indicate that you’re staying in the wrong places with the wrong people and adopted their mindset.

    Imagine your synapses are many little paths. And every time you have a thought, someone walks with a flashlight along this path. The more often you wander there, the more this path will be illuminated when you look at this from distance with long-time exposure. Soon there will be a six-lane dammed up street with lanterns for all your frequent thoughts.

    When you think about what’s going wrong all the time, you illuminate those paths. You’re entering a self-made pseudo-reality bubble. You make things worse by thinking about what’s going wrong all the time.

    The first step to a brighter future is to simply think positive and teach others to do the same. If you teach mankind to think positive, if you find advantages instead of threads, opportunities instead of fear, you could ban so many kinds of injustice and inequalities. You could end wars.

    Don’t do the same mistake so many humans do these days. Just think positive, give it a try. Hold your flashlight down the path you want to walk, so your highways will be set up there. Build a highway to luck, not to the bad luck.

    That simple neuro-biological truth is what we should teach each other and our kids.

    your expert for unsolicited advices
    friend m

    1. Dear friend m,

      interesting thoughts and I am with you in supporting a positive outlook onto our world. Still, do we not need to acknowledge and perceive problems — give them a name, understand them? — to know where to direct our positive thinking? I guess it is some kind of dilemma: illuminating the darkest paths while at the same time shedding light onto the brighter ones?

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